This year hasn’t been a good one for the Linkin park fans, as they recently faced the tragic end of their beloved lead singer, Chester Bennington, whose death was a result of depression. This brought together a lot of people, who agreed about the fact that depression kills too, and in a way, is far more worse than a disease condition.
While depression can push a person deep into the cave of emotions, we often fail to realise the fact that it is a result of suppression that people fall prey to depression. Very often in life, irrespective of who the person is to us, we tend to neither have time, nor make time for the person we care about. It’s all just in words. The words ‘I love You’ just hang in the air, when they are not expressed by the simple gestures that people would appreciate. A shoulder to cry on or an ear that would listen to their problems, might be all that they require to help them get through their battle.
Most people go through this phase of loneliness where they are stuck in a box, with no one to get them out of it. ‘Only with their own effort can they come out,’ is what the people around them try to tell them. But does anyone ever really understand how it feels to be stuck in a box, all alone, with no food to feed the hunger of companionship, no water to quench that burning thirst you feel as you gulp down the last bit of saliva your glands have secreted, with no light to help you figure out where you can start trying to open the box from and set yourself free?
Well, that’s exactly how some people feel, when the people around them, just stay around, right outside the box, and jeer at them and mock them, calling them all sorts of hurtful names. Instead of the mockery, why not help the person stuck in the dark, asphyxiating box by guiding them through their situation? Why not help them express, instead of making them supress?
All those times when they were walking through the dark and lonely tunnel, all they ever needed to hear from those around them was, “I’m here for you. Fear not, for there is light at the end of every tunnel, there surely is Hope at the end of your darkest moments!” And all they probably should be told is, “When you are walking through the darkest tunnel of your life, you should keep walking, maybe the tunnel will not end in a couple of hours, maybe you will be walking all alone, but if you keep walking straight, you will definitely reach the light. And that’s what we must strive to find. The light. All we must do, is strive till we find the light.”
If you ever find yourself drowning in the deep end of the pool just because you have given up swimming and not because you don’t know how to swim, look around you and see. Through the muddled vision of your eyes, now filled with the chlorinated water that is partially infused with negativity, observe. Your ears may be filled with the waters of sorrow you are drowning in and you might not be able to hear, but listen. There are many other drowning souls, just like yourself, lost and lonely, only drowning deeper and needing for some help. Just waiting on somebody to pull them out of the dark waters. Now there is a purpose! A reason why you should live. Only a person going through it can understand the other person on a very basic level.
“Follow the Yellow brick road, Dorothy, and you will reach the Emerald city.” That was one Long walk, indeed! I bet Dorothy would’ve given up too, if it wasn’t for the people she met on the way, The Scarecrow, The Tin Woodsman and The cowardly Lion, she could not have made it to the Emerald City to meet the Wizard. It was a good thing Dorothy had friends who walked with her, though they had their own reasons to meet the wizard, without them, the story would have ended up as one in which was a Depressed girl who had wished to return to Kansas, but had given up and lost all her hopes which she could have otherwise mustered up, had she had a good support system.
We live in a world deficit of Good support systems. Support system, yes, we do have those. But a good one is what we do not have, and what we will never have, if we continue to ignore our companions, our loved ones and most importantly, our children, when they cry out for help. Why is it that we wait until a loved one becomes a past tense, to realise that they were going through something that we will never come to see from their perspective?
Why can’t we start seeing things from their perspective and just cut people some slack, when they say they are depressed, instead of pushing them towards suppression?
If you are a parent, and you aren’t spending enough time with your child, I’m sure your child is not going to come and tell you that they’re going through a hard time. But if you only spent some time with your kid, you would know exactly what they’re going through. Well, don’t blame them when they turn to seek love from a handsome/ pretty ‘friend’, or comfort in the arms of a substance, because had you just been there for them and fulfilled your duties as a parent, your child wouldn’t be who he/she is right now.
Depression may not be considered as disease by layman, but it does qualify as a Grim reaper. It’s about time we all realised that when we lose someone we love, more than the pain of losing them, it is the guilt of all the things we could have done better, that will weigh us down. The guilt will eat through our very soul, until you get stuck in a box and this time, it is you.